02/28/06 - "She Loved Baseball"

Lastly this morning, I wanted to share this story, which I really enjoyed. I'm a big fan of baseball, I'm psyched the first Grapefruit League Red Sox game is tomorrow, even if NESN isn't carrying it. But I honestly don't know enough about the Negro Leagues. Anyone know of a comprehensive history I could read, either online or a real book?



02/28/06 - Holy shit the teamsters are racist bastards!! (honestly though, why am I surprised at that?!?)

Wow, this is the best article about the DP World / P&O merger that I've found yet ... I mean, the number of errors in this one quote alone are STAGGERING:

"How the hell could he sell these six ports to a foreign country, especially a foreign country that flew the planes in the World Trade Center and killed 3,000 people?"

Ack!!!



02/28/06 - The Simpsons this week?

Anyone see The Simpsons this week? I missed it ... what was I doing? I dunno. Guess I was at the coffee shop of the bro.

Anyway, I missed this, and only heard about it today. Pretty random. I love the quote from the Fox spokeswoman.



02/27/06 - Crazy T-Shirts

I love crazy t-shirts. Rude shirts. Clever shirts. Snarky shirts.

But I never buy them. Honestly I would never have the chance to wear them, except maybe on weekends and I generally try to leave the house as little as possible on the weekends. I mean, I love "New Mexico, cleaner than Regular Mexico" and "Your Retarded" and "GILF" ... but are these something a 29 year old wants to wear around rural Maine?

I guess I could go to the mall, hang out. But I feel like such a poser even walking BY Hot Topic as it is, imagine me wearing my "Pedro Lacks Political Experience" shirt while eating my Taco Bell in in the food court as the 16 year old skater punks laugh at me.

Nope.

But then there's this shirt: Jesus Hates the Yankees.

Perfect.

It mocks Christ, which I seem to do on a daily basis these days, AND the Yankees! It's everything I want in a shirt. Plus I could wear it to Red Sox games (even though I haven't been inside Fenway since spring of 1998 ...) or at least sports bars where I am planning to watch a Red Sox game. I could use it to strike up conversations with other atheist baseball fans.

Yeah, I think I need this shirt. It's nice my birthday is just a month away, too ... (hint hint)



02/27/06 - The Little Short Sighted Snake

I don't exactly know what they're saying (it's in Estonian) but this is a damn cool looking trailer for a short film - The Little Short Sighted Snake.

I love animation. Nicely designed, cartoony animation. It really warms your soul ... especially on a morning that's a few degrees below zero. DAMN!



02/25/06 - Don Knotts is dead.

Long live Don Knotts.



02/25/06 - Today the population hits 6,500,000,000

So today I've blogged about Mischa Barton and racist Republicans, and was going to end describing the nightmare I had about my old Asshole boss yesterday - a nightmare that woke me up at 3:30 am and didn't let me get back to sleep until 4:30 am.

But instead I read this article, and thought it might be fun to share.

Have a great weekend!



02/25/06 - Dubai Ports World

I'm sick of talking about this to people, so I'm not going to blog long about it. It seems that everyone I've talked to this week has asked me about it.

Dubai Ports World is buying London's Peninsular and Oriental Steam Navigation Company. P&O operates and leases 30 shipping terminals in 18 countries. DP World is owned by the government of Dubai, one of the seven emirates in the United Arab Emirates. And that's where the rub is.

If you're opposed to the sale ask yourself this, if DP World was owned by Switzerland, or Belgium, or Denmark would you still be opposed? There you go.

Granted, on the other hand I can understand the people who don't like the deal because DP World is controlled by the ruling family and not a publicly traded entity. But even in this post-Enron, post-Tyco, Sarbanes-Oxley world, public companies are still far from flawless.

If you oppose DP World running these ports, where do you draw the line on other industries? Should Emirates Air, state-owned like DP World, not be allowed to land in the USA?

I can also understand why Bill Frist and all of the big Republicans are up in arms about this deal ... when was the last time you heard the words "lobbist scandal" on the news?

Bastards. Racist, self-serving bastards.

Don't believe the politicians - any of them. These guys (and gals) have no souls, so form an opinion yourselves. Keep these facts in mind:



02/25/06 - Mischa Barton as Supergirl? Good God is everyone at Warner Brothers drunk?!?

I'll admit, I used to like The OC.

Season one was a clever take on the whole "teen drama" of 90210 and Dawson's Creek. The one where Ryan Atwood made out with his foster grandfather's hot young wife? Outstanding. Or when they found the aunt dancing at the strip joint in LA? Hilarious.

Season two got old quick. The new girlfriends and boyfriends introduced to liven things up came and went so quickly that I can't even remember their names. And then Ryan's brother came back, but he was played by a different actor and tried to get with the twig-sized Marissa Cooper? Whatever. The show lost me.

Season three apparently reintroduced Marissa's little sister, primarily because Marissa is no longer "hot" or "attractive" or even "mildly appealing to look at". And, in keeping with OC tradition they recast the sibling with a different, more Abercrombie actress.

Which brings me to this article I just read about the actress who plays Marissa Cooper, Mischa Barton. I guess the rumor is that she'd play supergirl?

Yikes. I guess you should be careful what you wish for.

Mischa Barton is not supergirl. Wake up Warner Brothers! She is a frail, bony, disgusting waif. Eat something you stupid whore!

Now Helen Slater, she was Supergirl. Hell, even the animated one is. But not Marissa Cooper.



02/24/06 - Another New Network?!?

Damn, with the merging of UPN and the WB I thought we finally got down to five networks, and now ... this?!?

With show names like "Desire" and "Secrets" you know it's going to be FOXTASTIC.



02/24/06 - Crap - Maine has a Guitar Center now.

I heard the radio yesterday, the distinct loud announcer torn from a monster truck ralley.

Guitar Center just opened a store in Maine.

Crap.

I hate those ads. They're obnoxious, repetitive, and ... obnoxious.

And repetitive.

And now they've infected the Portland airwaves.

Crap.



02/24/06 - "Here I Go Again, on My Own ..."

So on the way to work yesterday my iPod nano was uncharged (due to my continuing iBook issues) and I had to listen to the radio.

I click past the two (yes, two) Portland hip-hop stations and find WBLM, the shitty classic rock station in town. And, at 7:30 am they're playing Whitesnake's "Here I Go Again, on My Own ..."

Thus it's been stuck in my head for two days.

The best part was we were just singing it at work today, and we looked up Whitesnake.com.

The page is sideways.

I repeat: The page is sideways.

It's either the cheesiest thing or the coolest thing ever.

Much like their music.



02/24/06 - Apple Computer Sucks (Yet I Still Love Them)

On Monday morning I called Apple Computer to discuss my broken G3 iBook. The very nice guy on the phone said it qualified for the same repair it had last year at this time, and that he would dispatch a box for me to mail the computer back to him in.

I never saw the box.

This morning I finally called back, they had never sent the box.

So now I won't get it until Monday, and who knows how long it will take them to repair.

Bastards.



02/21/06 - del.icio.us

Man, I am so addicted to del.icio.us today!

Since my iBook at home crapped out (yes, again) and I was backing up my hard drive over the weekend I noticed how many good websites I have bookmarked buy rarely go to.

And how many times have you gone to look for a bookmark at home and realize it's on your computer at work?

That's why del.icio.us is so ... delicious. (Sorry, I had to!) Del.icio.us is a web-based collection of favorites - yours and everyone else's.

So you share your bookmarks with yourself at home, and all of your friends, too.

And since you qualify as a friend, here, check this out: my del.icio.us page.



02/19/06 - What exactly IS a logic board, anyway?

Yesterday afternoon I was all set to blog about this week's reason why new Disney President and CEO Bob Iger is the fucking man - and my iBook crapped out.

You might remember last year at this time (actually a year ago last week) my iBook needed the Expanded iBook Logic Board Repair Extension Program. I think that's where we are. Again.

Whatever a logic board is.

Yet I still love the Mac, so don't even go there.

Not as much as I love the Iger, though. This week's reason he's the man? Holding the Disney annual shareholder's meeting in Anaheim - home of Disneyland.

Why is that cool? Well, for the better part of the last decade the annual meeting has been as far away from Disney employees as possible. Seriously. Last year it was in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

The 1997 meeting was in Anaheim - where former Chairman Michael Eisner got an earful from Disneyland employees upset with their treatment, the treatment of the park and ... oh, some guy named Ovitz who got a $140 million severance package for just over a year's work.

So, again, Bob Iger is the man and my iBook sucks.

More ... eventually ...



02/17/06 - Bambi rehash... er, ah ... "sequel" beats Wallace.

The worst news I've heard all week.



02/15/06 - Kobe's back?

As you all probably have heard by now, we have a TV in the boys' room at work. I love it, except when someone puts Fox News on in the morning. Fox News is a little much at any point in the day, but in the morning all of that blather hits you hard. Chuck Norris hard.

The thing that gets me is that I'm usually one of the first people in the office in the morning. Do you think the cleaning people turn on Fox News? That seems odd. Cleaning people don't really seem the "Fox News Demographic". Scrubbing the bowl, listening to how it's good for the nation that Cheney shot that guy?

Anyway, just a few minutes ago I was peeing and I saw an new Nike commercial with Kobe Bryant. It feels like I haven't seen that dude on TV at all in the last, oh, say two and a half years.

It was a really gritty black and white dealie with Kobe lifting weights. There was some voice over, I couldn't really hear it but I think he mentioned, "Love or hate me, hate my game, hate my swagger. Hate my fadeaway, hate my hunger. Hate the fact that I ejaculate on the faces of little blonde girls in posh hotels ..." I couldn't really hear the rest.

No, I'm kidding. I'm happy for him. I'm sure he needs the money to pay off the next little bell clerk he messes with and then to buy some brick-sized ring for his ridiculously hot wife afterwards.

I mean, he scored 81 points in a single game, that should be worth something to the nation. Maybe McDonalds will come back to him now, too.

But somehow I think his Nutella deal is gone forever.



02/13/06 - Harrison Ford too old to play Indiana Jones.

Harrison Ford is now older than Sean Connery was when he played Indiana Jones' father in 1989's Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.



02/10/06 - melancholy

All day long today I've been melancholy. Maybe not melancholy, maybe pensive. Reflective. I think that "Boston" song this morning got to me. How I really did start a new life, where no one knew my name. And how, not even two years later, I have a great batch of friends here. Really close, personal friends.

Maybe it was the song, maybe it was seeing photos of my new apartment, maybe it was my new boss who's not a dick and actually says, "thank you" at the end of every day, and really means it.

So I'm pensive and reflective anyway, and then we get an e-mail from the CEO at the end of the day.

One of my really good friends is moving to the Southern California office, based in Long Beach.

On Tuesday.

What?!

She's the one who always has a couch for me if I've had a few too many drinks (say, like, last Sunday night). She's the one who knows EVERYONE in Portland. Seriously. She's the one who physically held me back from shouting matches in kickball. She's the one that I also had to physically hold back in other shouting matches in kickball.

I would totally go to the ends of the earth for her. And now she's going to the end of the earth, kinda.

I'm jealous and sad and upset and already miss her.

But then, I have to be excited. Because she's going to kind of start a new life, where no one knew my name.

And hey, that's worked really well for me twice now ...



02/10/06 - Holy Shit! Oswald the Lucky Rabbit belongs to Disney again!

Buying Pixar was one thing, but this act ... this act right here makes Bob Iger the fucking Man!

Rock on Bob Iger, rock on.



02/10/06 - Boston

Have you heard this song "Boston" by Augustana? It kind of fits the generic mellow pop stylings of The O.C. Not that that's a bad thing, my iTunes was chock full of O.C. tunes back un the summer of 2004.

And if this song was out that summer I would have listened to it 2 billion times, I think.

The lyrics are a little choppy out of context, but I got a tear in my eye this morning listening to it. Er, I mean, the sun was in my eyes, and ... um ... dude, it was cold out. It was like, 10 degrees. Yeah. That's it.

(sniff, sniff)



02/09/06 - They're making LEGO Batman sets!!!!

Check out these photos of boxes.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh mama.

Now Batman can fight Spidey for reals.

Wow.



02/07/06 - Flushed Away looks like POO!

Wow, check out the teaser for Aardman's first CGI movie Flushed Away. They are the Wallace and Gromit people, and, by the looks of this shitty CGI, they should stick to claymation.

Plus, um, anthropomorphic rats? Just gross.

Lastly, why does EVERYTHING they have to do be overly British? Couldn't they do something different just once?

Blimey.



02/07/06 - Beanpot on NESN!

Man, you have to love the New England Sports Network. Turned it on last night at The Monkey and The Beanpot was on. Sweet!

Boston University was playing Harvard at 8 pm, but after all of the BC / Northeastern post-game and BU / Harvard pre-game hoopla it didn't really start until 8:30.

Sadly we only watched the first period before we had to switch to Fox for 24. As much as I love me some college hockey, I love me some 24 more.

Luckily BU beat Harvard 5-3. So it looks like next week I'll have the same problem again. Ugh.



02/06/06 - Gold Penny

Yesterday was the Super Bowl, and I had a few cocktails. So many, in fact, that I ended up staying the night in Portland instead of driving back home.

It was nice having a 5 minute drive to work instead of the 75 minute drive I usually have. But I wasn't feeling great in the morning, so I got a Dunkin Donuts bagel to start the week right.

There's really nothing weirder than getting change back when you're hungover and finding a Golden Penny amongst the coins.


Normal Penny on left, Golden Penny on right

Trippy.

Because there's no such thing as a golden penny.

I was expecting Gene Wilder to jump out and give me presents. Or at the very least Johnny Depp ...

Everyone at work was interested, and we formed a theory. It was probably the senior project of some Maine College of Art kid, you know, some "mess with the general population as art" thing that's beyond me.

Still, I'm checking my closet for Gene Wilder tonight just in case ...



02/04/06 - wwtdd.com

It's blogs like www.wwtdd.com that make me want to never write again. It's so funny.

And I know some of you will be turned off that it's playing on the Tyler Durden name and has nothing to do with Fight Club and is basically People Magazine for twenty year old boys. But read this and laugh:



02/04/06 - Sports this weekend.

I feel distinctly un-American right now.

No, it's not because I think new House Majority Leader John Boehner is a shady bastard (although I do), or because I was very opposed to Alito's nomination to the Supreme Court (but I was). It's not even a post-State of the Union funk I'm in. It's because the Super Bowl is tomorrow and I really couldn't care less.

I know, as a New Englander I've been spoiled that the Patriots have been in the game so many times as of late. I know that 140 million people around the country are going to watch and eat and drink and watch tomorrow. And I'm not saying that I won't.

It's just I don't care.

We have televisions in the bathroom at work, and in the men's room it's a constant stream of ESPN, ESPN2 or ESPNews. So obviously this week it's all football all of the time. And I don't care.

On the other hand, Monday night is Beanpot hockey tournament in Boston. I'm psyched for that.

Four schools compete: Boston University, Boston College, Harvard and Northeastern. BU is the reigning champion, and my alma mater.

In fact, BU won all four years I was at school, and has only lost twice since then.

I'm trying to find a bar in Portland that'll be playing the game on TV, as tickets are tough to come by, plus BU is playing the later game and that'd be too late for Joshy. Maybe they have it on the radio? Or, ooh, the innernet. Maybe I can find streaming radio coverage ...

See, I'm excited for this and it's going to be impossible to see. That's kind of sad. So if anyone has any leads on how to watch/hear the game from away, shoot me a mail, yo. Thanks.



02/04/06 - Scary article about John Boehner a/k/a Tom DeLay Jr.

I don't know about you, but I feel better already. Oh, wait ... no ... no I don't ...



02/03/06 - odd.

Well ain't that just odd ...



02/03/06 - Red Sox changes in the off-season

So there were a few changes in the Red Sox roster over the last four months. A few dozen changes!!

Say goodbye to Mueller, Miller and Millar and hello to ... um, Flaherty and Huckaby? (That's all I got).

I bet they traded Hanley Ramirez by mistake instead of trading Manny. This is the fictional meeting between Theo's replacement GMs ...

RED SOX OFFICES, BOSTON, MA. Jed Hoyer comes running into the co-GM office he shares with Ben Cherington.

HOYER: "Sweet! I just got rid of Ramirez!"

CHERINGTON: "No way! That's awesome!"

HOYER: "Yep, he's going to play short-stop for the Marlins!"

CHERINGTON: "Dude? Manny doesn't play short-stop..."

HOYER: "I dunno, alls I know is that they took him!! Finally!!"

CHERINGTON: "Wait ... maybe you mean Hanley Ramirez, the short-stop for Portland? He has the strongest infield arm in the Red Sox system? He's been called the best athlete and fastest baserunner and one of our top prospects?!?"

HOYER: "I dunno."

CHERINGTON: "And you realize that we need a short-stop now that you STUPIDLY traded away Renteria leaving us to pay $11 million in salary and buyout options ..."

HOYER: "I dunno."

CHERINGTON: "You traded our top prospect away for whom?"

HOYER: "Some pitchers, Beckett and Guillermo Mota. And the best part, I told them we didn't need to perform physicals on them to save time."

CHERINGTON: "What?!?!"

HOYER: "Trust me, they'll be fine."

CHERINGTON: "NO!! Mota had an inflamed right elbow last May and he was diagnosed with shoulder tendinitis in September, you retard!!"

HOYER: "Crap, Larry's going to kill me."

CHERINGTON: "Now we still have Manny and need a short-stop. And a center fielder."

HOYER: "Yeah, sorry, I didn't realize that was Mrs. Damon."

CHERINGTON: "Idiot."

BOTH: "I miss Theo."

END SCENE.

Ha ha. Kidding. I really don't know anything about Cherington or Hoyer. Just jokes.

Anyway, here's the full list of changes:



02/03/06 - "Apple Sued Over iPod-induced Hearing Loss" and other Stupid Headlines

Apple Sued Over iPod-induced Hearing Loss

Even though the manual says, "permanent hearing loss may occur if earphones or headphones are used at high volume" this class-action lawsuit is still going forward. The rest of society should be able to sue these people for being idiots.

Nutritionist Campaigning Against Junk Food

This is news?!?

Retired Pitcher Jake Wade Dies at 93

Retired? Really? I can't imagine. Sure, few pitchers stay in the game through their mid-40s, Nolan Ryan retired at age 46 and Roger Clemens is contemplating retirement at 44, but Jake Wade was something else, pitching well into his 90s.

Simon Cowell to Search for Talent in Vegas

Hahahahahahahahaha!



02/02/06 - Narnia Rap 2: West Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide...

Wow, you just knew this was coming.

Check out the West Coast version of SNL's Lazy Sunday over at: Lazy Monday.

Wait, isn't that Senate Majority Counsel Cliff Calley from The West Wing?!?

And shouldn't the West Coast version be more Dre than Beastie?

Still, it's pretty funny. Here's my favorite part:



02/01/06 - What hath God wrought??

Not that I've ever sent OR received one, but this is kind of sad:




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